The Saudis have it right.  Women should not be allowed to drive.  Don't get me wrong...I am all for womens' right and equality and blah, blah, blah.  My concern is that most women I know are crap drivers!  I don't know if it's because they are easily distracted, allow their emotions to influence their activities or just lack the ability to judge spatial relationships as quickly and accurately as men but in my estimation roughly 75% of all motor vehicle accidents could be avoided by banning women from our roads.

Now of course if you ask a female motorist how good their driving is and they are likely to tell you that they are either good or VERY good drivers.  Then ask them about the driving ability of every other driver on the road and their answers will be vastly different, especially when it concerns male drivers.

According to one British survey conducted last year, a vast majority of men now believe that women and men are equal in driving ability.  Women on the other hand still believe that they make better drivers and express much less confidence in the driving ability of men.  In fact, only 9% of women drivers feel that men are the better drivers, while 45% of the ladies opine that women make better drivers than men.
Roughly 20-25% of all Jordanian drivers have been involved in a motor-vehicle accident in the past year, while roughly 20-25% of all Jordanian WOMEN drivers have been involved in a motor vehicle accident in the past 2 hours.  I say that with tongue firmly planted in cheek, but you get my point.

I am always apprehensive about climbing into the passenger seat when my wife is driving, but I do it because I like adventure.  From the moment we back out of the driveway at a snail's pace to the minute she BARELY avoids hitting the stone wall as she takes an absurd angle back into the driveway after our trip, it's one white-knuckle incident after another.  It's not hyperbole to say that watching her drive is like watching a really old person eat peas with a fork.

Let me paint this mental picture for you.  We climb into the car and as soon as she starts it up, my ears begin bleeding because the radio is on level 10 and the music comes blaring out of nowhere.  Really, who listens to music that loud?  I maintain she suffers from hearing loss but that's a story for another time.  Ok, adjust the seat and mirrors, release the parking brake and....here we go...slowly backing out of the parking spot.  Her head is on a swivel, turning this way and that, checking each mirror, hitting the brakes, correcting the steering wheel...backing up a bit more...more head swiveling and mirror checking and brake tapping and steering corrections.  It takes fully 2 minutes to get out of the driveway and not without several narrow misses.  And heaven forbid there is a car on the street opposite our driveway because then we could make a day of getting out of the driveway.

Ok, now we're free and on the road.  Of course the air-conditioning or heater is on FULL BLAST because she has not learned to nuance the controls for more or less air or moderate temperatures.  I typically just leave the window open.  In the winter it provides a cool respite from the hot air blasting from the vents and in the summer it gives me a nice gust of moderate air to counter the arctic freeze emanating from the AC.

We're driving along and within the first minute she receives a text message or a phone call.  This text or phone call is not arbitrary...I mean it's as if it's obligatory.  Does she call her friends before we leave to say "Give me five minutes to get out of the parking spot and then call me!"?

Now that she is actively engaged in texting for chatting away on the phone with her friends, I feel sorry for everyone else on the road.  Pedestrians and motorists alike are not safe.  I'm half convinced that we need a wailing siren on our car that sounds and advance warning that we are on the way.  It wouldn't even have to be a siren...it could just be a loudspeaker that repeats "MAKE WAY.  I DO NOT YIELD.  I DO NOT SIGNAL.  I DO NOT APPLY MY BRAKES, BUT I WILL BLARE MY HORN IF YOU DO ANYTHING SLIGHTLY OUT OF THE ORDINARY".

After 3 or 4 near misses with other cars, pedestrians and curbs we arrive at our destination.  I hope against hope that there is a normal parking spot available.  If it is necessary to parallel park or reverse into a parking spot, I just prepare myself for the inevitable argument.

I cannot understand that after 20 years of driving she never learned to parallel park or reverse properly.  It's mind boggling.  Every attempt evolves like this:  For parallel parking she pulls up too far or not far enough and then cuts the wheel at a ridiculous angle.  If we are lucky enough to avoid hitting parked cars, we invariable drive up on the curb, resulting in her getting angry and blaming me, at which point she grabs her purse and opens the door and tells me to park it.

Of course reversing into a spot is no easier, but has more yelling and arguing before I am asked to take over.  And don't even THINK about offering advice as she is trying to back into a spot while turning the steering wheel the wrong direction.

Earlier I mentioned the loudspeaker that announcers our arrival and refusal to brake for other drivers and pedestrians.  Please don’t confuse that refusal to brake for other drivers as a refusal to brake at all.  My wife LOVES to hit the brakes for no reason.  If we are traveling an empty road and there is no one for miles, out of nowhere she will see something in her peripheral vision that will cause here to suddenly apply the brakes!  I don’t even ask about it because it happens literally every 3 minutes.  Her driving is so erratic that it must wear the car completely out.  The alternating between accelerating and braking for no reason can make one physically tired from trying to keep your balance.  When I am driving, I think I might hit the brakes on the car ONCE on a trip from our flat to my office.  When she makes the same trip I swear she applies the brakes 25 times.

Now back to my original point.  The Saudis are on to something with this ban on women drivers.  I think every country should have a no female driver policy, at least during work hours and on the weekends.